My Descent (with edits)

Despite the mother I wanted to be and was for a while....my kids eat mac & cheese....often. They also eat french fries. Last night they dipped everything on their plates in ketchup. We have cable TV now. I use said TV to occupy them a few mornings a week to get lunches together.

Worst of all...
I bribed the kids at Target with new toys. Here is Llandis with her booty of Mickey Mouse dolls. In my shallow defense, the dolls were less than $1. And why four dolls when I only have two kids... they both have two hands. When they are fussy and don't want to ride while I calculate which brand of TP is a better deal, heaven help us if Llandis doesn't have one toy for each hand.




I don't know why I thought I could avoid all of the above. Did I think I had figured out the magic way to raise kids with out ketchup or bribery? It isn't possible. Even if you (yes you-judgemental mommy of one or nine who hasn't gone there yet) think it will never happen... one day you will be at Target walking in circles trying desperately to remember why you came in the first place because you KNOW what you need is important. The kids will be screaming, the old ladies giving you the control-your-kids-death-stare, and suddenly four 50 cent Mickey's will be look like shining stars of mercy on the sale rack. There is a reason parents do all of the above...survival.

Are you the mother you thought you would be?